Father of the Bride Speech Writing Service

My friend Martin asked me to help him write his father of the bride speech for his daughter.

I laughed and rather regretfully said, “Isn’t that what ChatGPT is here for now?”

And he very seriously replied.

“No Zena, my daughter means more to me than that.

I want to write it and have you help me. You must have heard hundreds of Father of the Bride speeches – good ones and bad ones!!! (I Have!)

You have the insight to know what makes a good one! With your experience you can make sure what I write sounds like me and I can deliver the speech I want to, and make her proud.”

My heart exploded into a thousand tiny, happy pieces. And I reflected on his beautiful request.

Yes, this is exactly what I can help him with.

The Process

Over the past 15 years and through creating over 500 personalised wedding ceremony scripts, I have always guided my couples into helping me create what needs to be, uniquely, their ceremony. I have learnt the nuance of tone and humour that allows their guests to see just how much work we have done together to get everything just right. I have helped my couples explore their own feelings and intentions, encouraged them to reflect and share stories and anecdotes with me that allow me to unlock and story tell parts of their lives and memories that they hadn’t even thought to share. And I have found at the heart of each and every one, the personalised and individual reasons why they want to get married. Because I have also learnt that no two weddings are the same.

You can’t just rely on the concept of marriage to give you insight enough, you can’t simply acquire reasoning and articulation from the entire human history of poetry and prose (although you can use it to inspire and you can borrow bits and pieces!), you can’t just borrow a joke you found on the internet if it isn’t the kind of joke you would naturally use (people know!) and you can’t google “best wedding ceremony ever” because it will never capture the personalisation you need to reflect wearing your heart on the outside for a brief and important moment in time.

So, I took the steps with Martin, leaning into the process I have developed over the past 15 years with all of my couples and relying on that process, used it to help Martin unlock what it was he wanted to be able to say. Our very own bespoke Father of the Bride speech writing service.

I made this process both easy, fun and most of all rewarding – with prompter questions and ways to unlock memories and conversations which allowed me to understand just how his relationship with his daughter manifested, so there was not one word in that speech that came from anywhere other than him.

And then I helped him shape all of this gathered information into a speech.

We had a little workshop on how to deliver it – how to help use your breath when you get to an emotional part to help you remain composed just enough, how to keep the timing perfect for each laugh and twinkle in his eye to hit straight into the heart of the guests, but mostly his daughter and her partner.

The result, Martin created the best Father of the Bride toast ever and was able to say when asked –

“Bloody hell Martin, did you get that from the internet or did you write that?”

“YES! I wrote it myself (with a gentle nudge from Zena!)”

That gentle nudge can be as big or as small as you need. I am here to facilitate and support, to take the pressure off and remove the hard work, but ultimately to let you have input into creating and delivering one of the most important expressions of support, love and pride you can find.

I need to add that over the years as a humanist celebrant I have also discovered that no family dynamics are ever the same. I have encouraged the toasts and speeches to be delivered by whoever a couple think the speech would come from the best and who feels the most comfortable – not every one can do a speech in public. (Although if even just a tiny part of you wants to, I can help you find the confidence and the courage to do it!)