Photos of Humanist Wedding Ceremonies | Zena Birch – London and Oxford Humanist Wedding Celebrant

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At the exquisite @manoir_beaulieu I found some #we

At the exquisite @manoir_beaulieu I found some #weddingdetritus in the form of a ‘still loaded’ bubble gun. So yes, I created my own bubble cloud to walk through. Because 8 year old me is always looking to get out! 🤣😜🫧🫧🫧🫧

It was so wonderful to marry Holly and James last

It was so wonderful to marry Holly and James last weekend, at last! My final covid rearrange!!! We met to start planning their ceremony all the way back in 2019, they had two new members to their family at the time, their son Kyllian and their dog Harley. I’d met James many years previously when I married his brother and so we were all so excited to get started and plot something truly wonderful for them. And then 2020 happened…
So, four years after our first meet and a whole new gorgeous human later - Jago, we finally all gathered to celebrate Holly and James and their gorgeous family of FOUR (five 🐶). And Wowsers, every single person gathered was so delighted to be there.
Sometimes within the commercial rhetoric of ‘your day’ it’s easy to overlook the fact that a wedding ceremony is just as much about the friends and family you have gathered as it is about you. Holly and James however hadn’t forgotten this for a second. This celebration was so exquisitely joyous. We had ALL waited to celebrate THEM. There were brilliant readings (one of which came with a guitar accompaniament, some real twinkly eyed teasing, huge laughter and the eternally romantic words ‘blah, blah, blah!’ 😜) we had extraordinary music from @mountainashnewquay, a spectacular confetti tunnel, 100% mouthwatering food from @ricksteinrestaurants and all in the village where H&J met and call their home.
All those years ago and right up to the day before at our rehearsal J&H had all the very reasonable hesitations about sharing so much with people, being a pretty private couple. But we talked about the power there is in being vulnerable amongst those who mean the most to you. It strengthens bonds, it truly does and your guests feel SO privileged to have been trusted with such intimacy. So it meant the absolute world to me when J&H sent me these words “Thank you so much for that beautiful ceremony, it couldn't have been more perfect. you were right, showing our emotions and being so open with everyone there made it really special. we have had so many compliments towards us as a couple now that they understand our love for each other more.” ☺️☺️☺️
James and Holly, thank you for trusting me x

#weddingdetritus #joywashere #lovetour2023 #zenasp

#weddingdetritus #joywashere #lovetour2023 #zenasparish

It was a truly beautiful Monday this week where we

It was a truly beautiful Monday this week where we were able to scatter the ashes of three dearly loved humans.
I married Caroline and Michael back in 2015, so had met C’s mum and dad, but sadly never her sister who had died back in 2004. Last year her mum died and earlier this year, her dad. And so we all gathered in a little village in West Wales - a place so very important to C’s family history, to celebrate their lives and then scatter their ashes, together in Cardigan Bay.
Our ceremony began with lunch and the sharing of so many found photographs, spanning lives from the 1930’s through to the present day. What a wonderful way to start a ceremony - with story sharing, reminiscences, horror at the state of hair in a few photos and laughter at clothing choices! So many unexpected stories arose.
Then we held the ceremony proper, with thoughts, reflections and words I’d gathered from absent friends as well as those gathered. With a safe space created we even had an impromptu post war childhood story which included an innocent and hilarious account of blackberry picking and the showing of a willy! Tears turning instantly to laughter.
Then half of us boarded a boat from New Quay, whilst everyone else made their way to a lookout at Llanina Point, where they could see us. A trusted family member had a copy of the script I was going to use on the boat, and there was something beautiful about the synchronicity happening on land and sea.
And dolphins joined us! As the sun came out two dolphins came and filled everyone on the boat’s sore hearts with absolute wonder and joy.
As ever, I am reminded of what an absolute privilege my job is. To bear witness to such connectivity, to help hold space for all our human emotions, to help grief find its outlet through story telling and communed experience and to remember just how vital it is to live as gloriously as we can. To help create experience.
The honour is real.
#funeralcelebrant #humanistceremonies #celebrationoflife #scatteringofashes #ashesfromaboat #returningtotheelements #storytelling #memorymaking #zenasparish #dolphinsatyourfuneral #untililandinyoursandwich #unrulyashes @humanistceremonies

#bridegroomcelebrantselfie My delicious Holly an

#bridegroomcelebrantselfie
My delicious Holly and Craig.
What an exquisite day we had @botleyhillbarn - back in June when we had our summer weather!!! (😬😩)
Sung into their ceremony by the dulcet tones of Holly’s best friend’s sister and walked down (without mishap - in spite of his love for a practical joke trip-and-fall!) by her Dad - who’s look to her mum mid way down had me welling up. So, so, so much love in the room. The ceremony was full of laughter and glee - just like Holly and Craig.
Happy two month (tomorrow) anniversary you gorgeous pair xx
#humanistceremonies #humanistcelebrant #lovetour2023 #zenasparish #junewedding #loveabrideandgroomsnuggledinmynook

Receiving this email after Monday’s ceremony mad

Receiving this email after Monday’s ceremony made me cry like a baby (this time of the year, my professionally repressed emotion finds its outlet weekdays as easily as a feather in the breeze!) Becky, James’ and their friend’s words meant even more to me because B and J had such a tumultuos few days before their wedding, with B’s dad suffering a stroke and being unable to attend the ceremony in person (we What’s App video’d him in and sent him the script, but we all know, that sadness and disappointment would have rained heavy.)
B and J had specifically chosen a small and intimate ceremony of only 40, so that every single one of their guests knew just how integral they were to them. And this meant B’s dad’s absence was felt by absolutely all of us. Compassion was palpable and an extraordinary salve. We had created a ceremony which literally celebrated every single person in the room with carefully crafted words and anecdotes. It was a privilege to still be able to deliver the words for B’s dad straight to him via phone, even if it wasn’t the plan.
And so, to know, that we were still able to turn a day edged with sadness back into the day exploding with joy that had been planned and dreamt of MEANS THE ENTIRE WORLD TO ME. So yes, I cried like a baby, and I am not ashamed to admit it.
So thank YOU Becky and James, and all of your beautiful friends and family. It was nothing short of a pleasure learning all about you and celebrating everything about you and your wonderful community of support. May you always know that this much love for you exists and may it always strengthen you like it did on monday.
And yes, feel free to start baby making, not least for the fun of it 😉
@beckypotter93 📸 @redonblondephotography 🎥 @c_jweddingfilms 💒 @manorhouselindley
#humanistceremonies #humanistcelebrant #fromcelebranttofriend #zenasparish #lovetour2023 #testimonials #realwedding #wordscount #yorkshirewedding #lovemycouples #mehelpingmakebabieswithoutdoingthedoitselfsince2011

Who needs words when there’s hugs? Thank you t

Who needs words when there’s hugs?
Thank you to the exceptional @angelawardbrown for capturing a moment where words are entirely redundant. This makes my heart full. Thank you.
#lovemycouples #zenasparish #fromcelebranttofriend #humanistcelebrant #theprocessiseverything #surroundedbylove #morethanjustajob #bridegroomcelebranthuddle #lovetour2023

Chelsey and Will I have so many glorious ceremoni

Chelsey and Will
I have so many glorious ceremonies to catch up on and so I’m starting with this joyful #bridegroomcelebrantNONselfie captured by the brilliant @andrew.brannan.photo from earlier last month @wickfarmbath
When Chelsey, Will and I met up for lunch midway through our process they brought their gorgeous son Henry. I fell in love with him hook, line and sinker and when we were all outside saying goodbye after lunch, he threw himself at my back legs and hugged me so tight, it may have been one of the best unexpected hugs of my life 🤣🥰 He carries so much wisdom for a nearly four year old that I asked him some questions to reveal to his mummy and daddy whilst he brought the rings to us mid-vows. Henry replied when asked “what does family mean?”
“family means I love you, I still love you.”
There is so much profound insight in that - comma, pause, “I still love you”.
Sometimes people ask me if I get an obscured take on love when being involved in so many happy days. But I know, and through our process, all couples know, marriage (which we are celebrating beyond a wedding day) takes in all the days. The good and bad, effortless and difficult, unexpected and monotonous. The intention behind committing yourself into marriage is because you hope to “still love you” through them all.
When a near 4 year old cuts to that insight immediately, you know you’re creating a bloody magnificent household and family. Chelsea and Will, celebrating you both was nothing short of an absolute gift from start to finish and now….beyond. Congratulations.
Exquisite peony bouquet by @honeysuckleflowerco
#thewisdomofchildren #alwaysaskthosewhowatch #humanistceremony #bathwedding #humanistcelebrant #lovetour2023 #zenasparish #istillloveyou

No words yet. Because this was beyond my imaginin

No words yet.
Because this was beyond my imaginings.
But this just happened.
#scottishelopement
#isleofskye
#elopmentcelebrant
#allthemagic
#ozandliv7ever
#marryintheclouds

When you ask your young guests to be artists for t

When you ask your young guests to be artists for the ceremony, you get a treasure trove of creative interpretations…I’ve been encouraging children to join in with the ceremony rather than just be expected to sit quietly for 12 years now and it NEVER disappoints! #artisart
#childrenatweddings #celebrantledceremony #humanistcelebrant #lovetour2023 #zenasparish #weddingkeepsakes #irreplacablegifts #artcollection #kidsart #loveart #alldrawingsarenotmadeequal #findyourinnerimpressionist #findyourinnersurrealist

I helped to create another book!! ☺️ (A comp

I helped to create another book!! ☺️
(A companion to The Little Book of Humanist Weddings we created in 2021).
I’m very proud of it. It’s not bleak, or sad, or overwhelming. It’s full of LIFE.
It should be essential reading for all. (I may be biased 😉)
Psssst! Come closer… I’m letting you in on a not so secret secret - it’s really about being alive. ✨
The magnificent @prof_alice_roberts and @copsonandrew are so gracious in their inclusion of so many wonderful insights from a myriad of @humanistceremonies celebrants - It makes me so proud to be part of such a network as this. Striving to make the big moments in life, the huge human collective experience one to fathom, understand, cherish and revel in.
Meaning is everywhere, these brilliant books help us to focus on how to not only notice but to share and revel in this life we have. Together.
There are so many words to treasure in this book. Please read it and enjoy. x

#weddingdetritus #joywashere @fioredoratoflowers

#weddingdetritus #joywashere
@fioredoratoflowers

How should you get from confetti line to the drink

How should you get from confetti line to the drinks reception? The CONGA! There really shouldn’t be any other way 😉
#congaline #congawedding #conga #HumanistCeremony #lovetour2023 #zenasparish #joyishere #workforyourdrinks #weddingreceptionwalks #alwayssayyes #icanmakewhateveryoulikehappen #humanistcelebrant @thebarnatavington @gbk13579 @srhodes15 #realweddings #weddingline #outdoorwedding

#bridegroomcelebrantselfie - What a day yesterday

#bridegroomcelebrantselfie - What a day yesterday was! Personalisation pimped! Not only did Eveline and James get married in Ev’s family back garden, but the ceremony itself took place about 7 meters from where her and James first felt sparks fly. In her mum’s kitchen!
Expressions of love come in so many forms, but the care and attention that Ev’s mum showed in preparing her garden for their day, was genuinely jaw dropping. From the creation of all of the flower arrangements, to the collection of shells from places special to them - to add to the arrangements and sculptures, the dinner table and even Eveline’s headpiece.
Our ceremony was just as carefully and personally created. Retelling their story was immense amounts of fun, which the laughter, smiles, tears, and out pouring of love from all of their guests can attest to.
And an exquisite collection of deeply personal creative elements. We tied their knot with climbing ropes James uses as a tree surgeon, we created a community certificate for everyone to sign - from the most beautiful piece of wood, hand crafted and hand etched by James (so well sanded, it looked varnished before anything has gone on it!!!), we had a pitch perfect and moving (surprise for E&J) reading in Dutch by Eveline’s mum and two sisters (not a dry eye to be found) and the Dutch tradition of a wish tree, where every guest’s wish for them was written and tied as the centre piece to their reception space.
Add to this friends who had known them for years, families who have already become intermingled, dogs in attendance, the nicest weather day of the year so far and Eveline and James being two of the nicest people you will ever meet and frankly, I pinched myself all day. The natural high infectious. I think even the breeze was happy.
#lovetour2023 really is flowing like a dream this year.

#weddingdetritus #joywashere #petalslavenderandric

#weddingdetritus
#joywashere
#petalslavenderandrice
#lovetour2023

There is no feeing like it. Being squeezed in betw

There is no feeing like it. Being squeezed in between two people who I’ve just had the privilege to unite formally, delightfully and full of all the exquisite *themness* a ceremony celebration should have.
It’s such a fascinating thing, to start out as strangers and by the time we get to this little #bridegroomcelebrantselfie ( #12yrlonghashtagstillgoingstrong ) we have shared so much. It’s still a unique privilege.
The initial tentative chats, the big talks, the long dinners, the zooms, the emails, the intimacy growing, trust established, the text messaging, the majesty of standing so close to them and witnessing moments of powerful real life experience never to be replicated again and ultimately, the friendship which grows.
I almost felt bad in parts of @wilgregory and @rutheagle for having to carry the ceremony script onwards, as there were some moments when the look, the energy, the timelessness of the moment passing between then was so acute that it felt electric. Not sharp electric shock electricity, but the energy, the power, the fizz, the miracle that brings the inanimate to life - that kind of electricity. I could feel time shapeshifting between them, I witnessed from a closeness that is such an honour, that time was standing still for them. Solidifying. Their shared look - the past they’ve shared, the present, and their hopeful potential - being set and protected in amber through the connection of their eyes.
Honestly, I know I can wax lyrical, but that’s because these experiences require it. The ordinary to the extraordinary. My goodness, marrying Will and Ruth was a spectacular pleasure. Raise your mescal for me this evening - I’m still walking on air since Saturday xxx
Photographer for the day @kristianlevenphoto Exquisite flowers @rebelrebele8 Venue of dreams @rsaweddings @rsahouse
#humanistceremony #zenasparish #londoncelebrant #momentsofmeaning #lovetour2023

Creating more memories and getting to know each ot

Creating more memories and getting to know each other better whilst moving from dock to dock. This was a corker of a couple meeting today and an adventure in the sun (and in the tunnel!) to boot. Thank you @hannahgarton and @martin_dobinson for such a nourishing (best vegan feta ever!!), productive, illuminating and glorious afternoon on Regents Canal. Working hard doesn’t always look like working hard. #lovetour2023 #zenasparish #makingceremoniesbetter #itsnotjustaonedayjob #tunnelescapades

Wedding detritus. #joywashere #weddingdetritus

Wedding detritus.
#joywashere #weddingdetritus

Celebrating the gorgeous Alex & Laura over the Cor

Celebrating the gorgeous Alex & Laura over the Coronation weekend with bubbles & sunshine a-plenty!
When I visited them up in Leith for one of our 'getting to know you better' sessions - I arrived into Edinburgh to an unexpected flurry of snow & yet sunny blue skies. So it seemed appropriate that sandwiched between two torrential rain days, the sun shone for them! And I am so glad it did as the no confetti rule at the beautiful @pembroke_lodge was side stepped with some hard core bubble guns & they glowed in every possible colour reflecting the technicolour of A&L’s exquisite flowers - making the walk back down the aisle so much fun A&L came all the way back down it again! (A phenomenon that ALWAYS happens when you opt for bubbles!)
With one of the most exquisite readings I have ever heard (read immaculately by their friend David), the passing of their rings was effortless - with two poignant pieces of music & an opportunity to gaze out over the view of W.London & beyond which Pembroke Lodge affords, whilst reflecting on everything that had been shared so far, & SO much had been shared. I learnt as I got to know them both, just how important Alex and Laura’s friend & family support network is - so intrinsically woven that we dedicated an entire section of the ceremony to celebrating them, both generously and very teasingly! - Holy shit! The laughter and crying was off the charts in the best possible way.
We also had use of Laura’s granddads Quaich - engraved and 97 years old, it had been used at many wedding before them - a real heirloom & filled with Scotch from the Isle of Skye very close to where A&L got engaged. No shoe horning unnecessary features into a ceremony with me, it resonates with meaning, if it doesn’t, we don’t need it. Laura was accompanied down the aisle by both her mum & dad - & Alex’s mum & dad joined in full voice to affirm L&A’s choice to be getting married. Rightly so, words count, so allow everyone to partake in the pride of watching their children get married!
Laura & Alex, so much merriment was had, you created such an exquisite day & night and I adored every second of our process together, Tapas beckons us again & I cannot wait.

To honour my brother’s anniversary I took my mum

To honour my brother’s anniversary I took my mum to Rome, and we spent the evening exploring on the back of a Vespa. It was one of those never to be forgotten bits of memory making. We can’t thank Simone and Marco enough for making the three hours so entertaining, informative and thrillingly safe! And I HIGHLY recommend @scooteromatours Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping us create such moments to be treasured. My mum loved it. That’s amore.

Mike and Ameena were married at the truly delectab

Mike and Ameena were married at the truly delectable Cowdray House. With Iraqi heritage Ameena’s sister helped us incorporate something beautiful, the language of their father, into the ceremony. To illuminate love in a way the English language, with all its many words fails to do. Here is her reading in transcript, translated. It was perfection. When you let the people you trust find a reading* for you, you will always be rewarded.
“Of all the emotions we experience, none are as broad and rich, as crucial, or as powerful as love.
And while there are countless ways we love, the word “love” is a shape-shifter. A singular word with one thousand and one meanings. It’s represented momentary delight, passing affection & deep devotion. But how can one word capture the pure vastness of the most sacred human emotion?
While there’s no language in the world that truly has enough words to describe love, our father’s tongue does a pretty good job. The following reading pays homage to the vast spectrum of love, expressed in a way that only the Arabic language can.
From The Map of Love by Ahdaf Soueif
‘Hubb’ is love.
‘ishq’ is love that entwines two people together,
‘shaghaf’ is love that nests in the chambers of the heart,
‘heyam’ is love that wanders the earth,
‘tyah’ is love in which you lose yourself,
‘walah’ is love that carries sorrow within it,
‘sababeh’ is love that exudes from your pores,
‘hawa’ is love that shares its name with ‘air’ and with ‘falling’,
‘gharam’ is love that is willing to pay the price.” (See slide 2)
*All of Mike and Ameena’s readings were a surprise for them on the day. Whereas I think it is important you have editorial control over the final draft of your ceremony - words which are fundamentally representing you & your intentions, having pockets of surprise in a day you have often meticulously organised is the joyful surprise YOU deserve! So I often keep readings out of draft scripts. Watching you listen, the same way as your guests are is such a beautiful thing to witness.
#bridegroomcelebrantselfie #zenasparish #lovetour2023 #humanistceremony #arabicreading #uniqueweddingreading

The first ever* zoom wedding in lockdown. THREE YE

The first ever* zoom wedding in lockdown. THREE YEARS AGO! Paula and Loc were due to get married on the 28th March 2020. The UK went into lockdown on the 23rd. Loc had proposed to Paula in 2014 and they had put their time, love, money and commitments into their gorgeous children and their business in between. The 28th was finally supposed to be THEIR day. After having spent a night with them and the children only a month previously, I knew how excited Lily and Tobi were to be part of the wedding - schools closed, isolated from friends, I couldn’t bear the idea of another disappointment for them. So, we invented this - the same time, same date, multiple location, sensible, social distancing celebration. (Catchy! 😜) All of us new to zoom, many guests downloading it for the first time we gathered from our homes. I asked Lily and Tobi to bury the wedding rings in colourful rice (which they had fun dyeing on their first day off from a closed school) and keep the rings safe until the rescheduled wedding date - set for January 2021 (how wrong we were thinking that was a safe date far enough away!!?). We had sent out an email asking all guests to have a bottle with a popping cork so we could all pop corks simultaneously at the end of the zoom ceremony and I asked every guest to date stamp these corks - to bring with them and pop in a jar when the real wedding finally happened. And on June 4th 2022, that finally happened. And Lily and Tobi kept those rings so safe - pouring them out to tears and applause. My journey with Paula, Loc, Lily and Tobi is one that I will treasure forever and we are now life long friends - I’ll always thank pesky covid for that silver lining. Watching this video back (made by the exceptional @toastofleeds) makes my heart so full & a tiny bit achy at the same time - none of us could foresee how long we’d all only have screens to connect us, and the wonder, joy and new fandangledness of it all exudes through the screen. Mine, Paula & Loc’s livelihoods all suffered fairly catastrophically as the months went by, but on this day & then in real life in 2022 being able to share how we all adapted, grew & loved is a bond never to be undone. #3yearson

#weddingdetritus IS BACK. And one of my former b

#weddingdetritus IS BACK.
And one of my former brides who is a guest today (@livsophlow) whispered over my shoulder - “Zena - detritus!!” - how I love my couples ☺️☺️
#lovetour2023 #bringiton #watchthisspace #joywashere

This photo is from the first ever wedding I did as

This photo is from the first ever wedding I did as a qualified humanist celebrant back in 2011. (It was a truly epic reception and one I will never, ever forget!) It also came at a time when my world as I knew it had entirely collapsed and I had to start everything again from scratch. Often, that really is when you’re at your bravest, rawest and most unhindered.
That was almost 12 years ago and to say that it lit a fire in my belly to make sure that no couple should ever have an impersonal ceremony ever again is an understatement.
Now, all these years on, proud of all my mentees, excited by the revolution that spread through celebrancy, honoured to be a part of a thriving and supportive network and 420+ couples later….I look at this photo with real affection. I had no idea of the enormity of what was to come. The extraordinary people I would meet, and the lifelong friends I would accrue. The experiences I would be part of and help shape, and the insightfulness that would permeate my mind, heart and soul.
I never take this work for granted and I’m so grateful to every single incredible human who has trusted me with an intimate view into their lives. And who happily never expected (nor asked me) to simply wear a smart and appropriate suit 😜😜 Here’s to many more moments of meaning shared with what must now be thousands upon thousands of people. And here’s to never being frightened of an upended life and the unknown around every corner.
#theweddingofdanandjackie #myfirstdanceagain
#whatasocialhistoryprojectthisallis #zenasparish #humanistuk #humanistcelebrant #humanistceremonies #lovemyjob #expecttheunexpected #joywashere #outofthefireaphoenixrose #noordinarywedding #everybodylovesahappyending #celebrantjourney #neverbeafraidtochangethenorm

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